The case of the furry unstoppable sex machine!!! [or: size matters... baobabs are for winners, bonsais are for whiners!!!]

This is my last case... a case that pushed me to the limit of my almost "Job-patented" patience!!! One day this little dog comes to me and soundly barks about his "sex tool" being like some sort of divine gift to the female species of this planet!! Deeply interested (yeàh, suuure!!! hùmf!!) I kept listenin' him talkin' 'bout his "Here's-where-my-brain-really-works!!" apparatus, about his long-timed "resistance" ( a word that pronounced in French sounds cosmically hilarious... but I digress, ehmm...), about his "charme" (another word that, expressed in French, makes me think 'bout "bidèt-less" gays... and don't ask me why, 'cos' I'm still digressin'...) and about his restless search of action to tame his untameable pleasure-engine!!! I've been there in yawn-mode waitin' for the conclusion of his tales for about three hours and then, after his last "this-piece-of-meat-beats-the-diamonds-for-the-best-female's-friend-game" story about his excavator toy, I simply asked: "Ehy! If it's all iron&tall lights like the Eiffel Tower (and here I could digress for months comparing the famous fallic symbol to the mascolinity of the nation who build it...!!!) ...what's the problem? I mean: I'm paid for each hour you stay here, and you can stay for how long you like it... but what can I do for you?" So Rambo... òh, I forgot to tell you this guy's name, ùh? Blessed his obviously blind human pet!!!... so Rambo told me: "But this is the problem!! I can't stop being excited and on the hunting-mode for chicks... whatever number of legs they have!! I really can't do anything in my life except f§ç£ ev'rything in sight!!!" I told him that already exist some pills or even some surgery remedies to his pathology... but he told me he already took a lot of pills with no results and that he didn't want to lose his precious "albero maestro"... So I thought and I thought... and finally realized how to help the hellion-dog!! Like all my ideas, this was a real stroke of umparalled genius!! I told him to try to have sex with me... to act like I wasn't his doctor but an unknown furry bitch in heat!! He turned up almost immediately and tried to possess me as soon as we went out for a walk... and try was all he was able to do for almost four hours... yes, four hours of failed moves to shag me!!! In the end of the day, he was so tired and frustrated and humiliated that he never got excited any more and so, all I had to say was: "Boy! I can't see you now... but I can't even imagine if you tried to f§ç£ me or played "Harry Potter & his invisible magic stick" all the time!!! D'ya read me?" That was the end of the case: last time I heard about Rambo, he was in France doing some street-shows dressed like a gay Pierrot (who else ?) and barkin' out evangelical nonsense about the sins of pre-marriage sex!!! Ah! Another case well resolved, another patient satisfied... and another lesson of life gifted to ya all!! Remember you out there: sometime it's all in your mind... and if you can comprehend zen... go, stay closed in your room for a day or two and repeat the subtitle of this article like a mantra... In the end you'll accept the truth...or you'll run to the nearest florist, who cares? See ya soon... till then it's always Aloooouuuhaaa f'r ya!!